Top Chef Masters – It’s An Offal-Ly Close Race, Plus Is The French Way Always Better?

Top Chef Masters - Offal Tasty

Still no Michael Chiarello. Gosh, they’re making us wait a long time.

The first chef this week is Wilo Benet. I love him. From his first word, “Hola”, he seems so cute and kind. He’s the Chef/Proprietor of Pikayo in Puerto Rico, as well as a couple of others. Tom says he is Puerto Rico’s first celebrity chef.

Cindy Pawlcyn is the chef of Mustard’s Grill in the Napa Valley. She’s been cooking since she was 13 and she’s playing for Clinica Olé.

Ludovic Lefebvre is the French chef/owner of Ludo Bites in Los Angeles. He’s got that kind of Zac Efron hair that’s plastered on his head and in his face. (I’m a HUGE Zac Efron fan, I just don’t like the hair.) Ludo's charity is C.H.A.S.E. for Life.

Rick Bayless of Frontera Grill and Topolobampo is the last chef. Everyone knows Rick Bayless - the master of Mexican cooking. His charity is the Frontera Farmer Foundation, which gives grants to small farmers.

Kelly comes in. Rick is so friendly and open. He says he’s a bit nervous to be cooking in an unfamiliar kitchen and that it’s much easier to be judge. Wilo smiles. Ludo kind of frowns in disagreement. I’m guessing he would never admit to any weakness.

They have to draw knives. They’re all different colors. They have to create a dish using ingredients of that single color. The judges for this Quickfire are Chris Oliver - food stylist, Joann Cianciulli - cookbook author and Christina Peters - food photographer. Obviously, the presentation of the dish will be as important as the taste in this challenge. They have 30 minutes.

Cindy’s worried because she says she’s older than the others and not as fast as she used to be. I think she looks pretty tough and she IS cool. She says she’s stubborn and determined and that’s how she became a chef in the days when there weren’t many women chefs.

Rick is amused because he describes himself as “the king of slow food”.

I can’t but think that Ludo’s Frehhh-nschh accent is un petit exaggerated and he has an ego to match. That should make him an awful lot of fun to watch, especially if he loses. He says the training in France is very, very tough and you’re under a tremendous amount of pressure. He says he used to go home at night and cry after days working with Alain Passard.

Rick is happy he got the color green, which is the color of his favorite foods. He tells us he grew up in Oklahoma City in his parents barbecue restaurant. He says that Mexican cooking is often done in an “intuitive style”, which he tries to emulate.

They rush around to finish before time’s up. Merde! Ludo is mad because he forgot the tomato on the plate. Well, Frenchie, let’s see how well you do now.

(You know that I hold French cuisine at the very top of the pack and I think the French have an inherent sense of taste and style. But that doesn’t mean they can’t be ribbed for their – not completely unjustified - hubris.)

Ludo - Red

Steak Tartare With Watermelon, Red Onions & Red Beet Gazpacho

The waiter forgot to bring out Ludo’s beet gazpacho. Well, THAT’S not fair. The judges say the tartare is amazing. He gets the waiter to bring out the sauce, They pour it over and they actually prefer it the other way. One says it looks like blood.

Cindy - Yellow

Yellow Vegetable Curry Over Sweet Corn Grits & Fried Corn Tortillas

One judge loved the different shades of yellow and different texture throughout the dish.

Rick - Green

Roasted Vegetables, Molé Verde With Tomatillos, Green Chilies & Pumpkin Seeds

One says it’s complex, another says very tasty.

Wilo – Orange

Smoked Salmon Tartare With Coconut Milk & Tomato Paste Sauce

Judge: I love the color and the texture. She does wonder whether the steel ring should have been left on. Of course, it shouldn’t have. Wilo! You messed up. They LOVE the flavor…maybe the most of any dish. Wilo laments that leaving the steel ring on is like wearing a tuxedo with the dry cleaning tag hanging out.

The results:

Ludo - 3 stars

Cindy - 3½ stars

Rick - 4 stars

Wilo - 4½ stars

Ludo is mad. Wilo says he feels lucky to have won. His charity is the San Jorge Children’s Research Foundation. He’s sweet.

The Elimination Challenge is to create a street food dish that will be served to people…on the street, I guess…at Universal Studios. The catch is that they’ll have to convince the public to eat something a little more adventurous than normal.

Uh-oh what is it? It can’t be a domesticated animal, I suppose, but maybe something gross that is found under the sea. Maybe something slimy and jellied. Dunno…

Oh gosh, it IS some kind of protein and they draw knives to see what they get.

Wilo gets beef hearts. The Frenchman should have gotten that. He probably eats them for breakfast. Cindy likes offal. Rick gets tongue and he says he actually loves to eat tongue. (I ate it as a kid. It really does have great flavor and makes a great sandwich.)

Cindy gets tripe. She’s not bothered. Ludo has Pig’s ears. Rick says (to us) better him than me, because he’s never cooked them before.

Ludo is fine. “I like zat. I use ZAT in France.” Actually his accent is a bit less strong than before. Then he adds (in a VERY Frehhh-nschh accent),”If you want to be the master, you need to know about food. I know how to cook a pig ear…I know all these things.” Harrumph to you too, buddy! Oh, this is funny, Bravo thinks we’re so uncultured that they put subtitles in English under Ludo as he speaks.

They have $300 and 45 minutes to shop and 3 hours to prep and one hour the next day.

At Whole Foods, Ludo asks Rick for advice about Mexican cheese. Rick thinks (to himself) that that’s a bad idea for Ludo. It’s nice, they all help each other. Cindy is hilarious. I’m picking her early. She says she started a club back home called “Girls who eat guts”, where she and her friends go out and eat offal, so she should be fine.

Ludo finds out Rick is doing tacos. Merde again.

Cindy is concerned that she’s using a pressure cooker. Rick is amused. He helps her.

Ludo starts a vegetable broth. Wilo has never cooked beef hearts before. He slices them thin. Rick is happy, because he has more time to cook in his style of bringing lots of flavors together. Ludo is freaking out, and the others help him. He wants nothing to do with that.

Wilo is so darling talking about his charity, which is a hospital for children with terminal illnesses.

Cindy is smart to do a soup, so there's no problem getting it all ready. Ludo is behind and has so much to cook and get ready at the last minute.

Rick – Tongue

Chorizo, Bacon & Tongue Tacos With Guacamole & Pickled Onions

It looks great. Rick finds it hard to serve and talk and sell the tongue, but he does a great job. Kelly comes over and introduces the critics. Same old, same old.

James: Wow! This is brilliant. Melt in your mouth tender. Jay agrees. Gael: I definitely would have a second.

Wilo - Heart

Beef, Ham & Chicken “Tripleta” In Pita Bread

I wonder if he’ll get marked down for mixing the heart with other proteins.

The crowd loves it. He has a whole rhythm going. I like him. One person says, “I think I can feel it beating in my mouth.” Eww.

James: Too much topping for me. Gael says you can’t even get into it. Jay: There are lots of textures in here. James says this is really tender compared to other hearts he’s eaten. There has to be something wrong with that sentiment. Jay is impressed that he hasn’t slopped on his shirt.

Ludo – Pig Ear

Pork Quesadilla With Chorizo, Pinto Bean Puree, Lime Aioli & Smoked Paprika

THAT sounds fantastic, but Ludo is having a problem getting the food cooked in time. Usually, he says he has five guys helping him. The judges approach and when his food isn’t ready, he tells them about the Frehhh-nschh way he’s cooked the pig’s ears. Ludo is trying to charm Gael with his accent. The guys are getting fed up at having to wait for their food.

James: “The texture of the pig’s ear itself is very appealing.” Now when was the last time you heard THAT? Jay: It is. It’s a satisfying mouthful.

Cindy – Tripe (Stomach)

Hot & Spicy Menudo

She tells folks that it’s a great hangover cure. They like it. Jay is surprised that it’s a little under-seasoned. James agrees, but says the tripe itself is terrific. Gael: Sweet and tender.

The public rates the dishes. The chefs all feel they did well. Ludo really wants to beat Rick, the King of Mexican food. He says that would be BIG for him. Ludo says (to us), “Let’s go, let’s go. Give me my score and tell me I win.” Rick, meanwhile, says he had a blast.

Back at the Critics Table, Ludo explains how he made his dish. He wanted to serve it in a familiar way that wouldn’t scare people away. Gael says that was a wonderful choice.

James does his thing of HOW did you cook that and then asks for the ingredients in the broth in which the pig’s ears were cooked.. Heaven forbid, he should guess something and be wrong. It is interesting to learn, though, that Ludo put turnips in his court-bouillon. James says he would have expected to get a lot more of those strong flavors on his palate, but he didn’t. That's a bad thing, apparently.

James says Cindy’s tripe was tender, even though she was worried about it not having enough cooking time. Gael liked that it was “a hot stew on a cold day”. Jay asks her if she “stinted” on her seasonings, because she was nervous about the public not liking the tripe in the first place. Cindy says she “was trying to make the world’s most introductory menudo”. Jay says the broth was under-seasoned and under-flavored. Pooh.

Rick was happy to get tongue. Kelly says she loved the Cotija cheese. Jay wonders if the dish couldn’t have used more acidity. Rick says that’s what the tomatillo guacamole was for. James says the tongue was cooked brilliantly and he loved the whole dish.

James asks Wilo how the meat is traditionally prepared for a tripleta. He says it’s not usually as finely julienned as he did it here. James says heating the pita would have been time well-spent. Gael loved the spicy mayonnaise in the bottom of the pita pocket.

The chefs go back to the kitchen with a full bar waiting for them. The critics go at it. James says Cindy’s menudo was “weak in the knees”. He says it’s got to have punch.

Remember how I wondered in the first Top Chef Masters if these published critics would be up to producing appropriate sound bites. They’re doing a good job.

Rick says (in the kitchen) that it was all harder than he thought it would be. He opens some wine.

Gael loved Wilo’s pita, which served as a cup. James says he cut the heart too thin to really taste it.

Gael though Wilo’s dish was perfect. Jay says it was a big, bright, wonderful mouthful. James: Absolutely delicious. Wilo’s winning, that’s my guess.

James thinks Ludo’s dish didn’t work, but Jay says he had the toughest ingredient to work with and he did a pretty good job.

They combine the Diners’ scores (that’s the public) with the Critics scores and the points they got in the Quickfire.

Ludo

Diners’ – 3½ stars

Critics – 4, 3, 3 stars

Total 16½

Cindy

Diners’ – 3 stars

Critics – 2½ 3½, 3

Total – 15½

Cindy is excused to go back to the kitchen.

Rick

Diners’ – 4 stars

Critics – 5, 5, 4½

Total – 22½ stars

Ludo is told to go back to the kitchen.

Wilo

Diners’ – 4 stars

Critics – 4, 4, 3

Total – 19½ stars

Rick wins. He’s thrilled that the $10,000 donation to the Frontera Farmer’s Foundation “will change lives for people”. What a good guy. Rick says he played to his strengths, which all his chefs at home had told him to do. Wilo and Rick hug. Ludo wants to come back to Top Chef Masters 2. They’re all quite chummy. It’s nice.

Ummm, I don’t see Michael Chiarello in the next group either when they show the previews. They’re really holding out on us until the last minute.

I think they’re doing a really good job with this show. Even at the beginning of each episode, when I’m bummed that MC isn’t on, they somehow still get me to watch. I love chefs anyway and I'm fascinated by the snapshots we get of their personalities. Are they accurate? I don’t know, but it’s fun to see a chef you admire in a different (and sometimes difficult) situation. And, as we all know, if it's caught on film it must be true.

Aida Has Her Mom Over, Noah Is Inappropriate Plus A Master Skewerer

Ask Aida with Aida Mollenkamp

Mollenkamp Moms
Ginger-Rum Bundt Cake
Lemon Chicken with Artichoke Hearts

While watching this episode, I found myself thinking and, thus, writing things that I don’t really approve of. I couldn’t leave them out (well, I COULD, but I chose not to), so I put the really mean stuff in small letters. Feel free to skip those parts...Aida’s mother.

The only episodes of Ingrid’s that I liked were the ones that featured her mom, so I figured maybe Aida’s mom would bring that same thing to her show.

It’s hard not to notice that there’s a bit of a difference between Aida’s mom and just about anyone else’s - HER MOM IS HOT. And Aida looks like she glammed up a bit to share the spotlight.

Aida starts with a family recipe for sautéed chicken. She chops a yellow onion while What’s-His-Name interrupts with a question about tears while chopping onions. She goes through the standard answers:
Refrigerate onions.
Turn on fan or open window.
Turn on the gas flame.
Finally, she gives the same answer I would - younger onions produce fewer tears. (And I DO think refrigerating them makes a difference.)

Aida adds oil to a heavy-bottomed skillet and then her onions. Her mother uses only basil so that’s what she’s doing today. She slices garlic (not the way I would, but few do).

She begins to cut her chicken breasts. Noah (oh yeah, that’s his name) pipes in with a question about whether you should always pound the chicken breasts. (Okay, I know there are no dumb questions, but...Aida says sometimes you do, sometimes you don’t. It depends on the recipe. Duh!)

She adds the chicken to the pot to sauté. I would do the order differently. I would sauté the chicken first and get it nice and brown and then I would remove it from the pan, lower the heat and soften the onions. This recipe doesn’t have that much going for it, so you need to squeeze every bit of flavor out of it. Wait, sorry, I meant to write that as, “This recipe doesn’t have that much going for it, so you need to squeeze every bit of flavor out of it.” Joseph from Brookline, in the comments section of the recipe, is very astute.

Aida mixes together 1/3 cup water and 2/3 cup white wine. She grates a lemon and squeezes a bit of juice. Noah has another brilliant question - what’s the difference between lemon zest and lemon peel? One is peel and one is zest! I’m waiting for the question “Where is my head?” And Noah certainly won’t know the most obvious answer. Aida is much nicer and says the zest is the finely grated part of the lemon and the peel is usually in bigger pieces and removed.

Apparently, this show is for folks who usually order takeout, because Aida has mentioned quite a few times already that her recipes will take just a bit longer than ordering out. In fact, she says they will take only 5 extra minutes.

I’m not sure I buy that and, perhaps, she hasn’t factored in the cleaning-up time. Anyway, the reason to cook at home isn’t because it’s as fast as ordering out. I don’t think anyone could argue that. It’s because it can be cheaper, healthier, more satisfying and more relaxing. But let’s face it, at times it can also be more expensive, fattening, irritating and tiring. I wonder if after this show, we’d rather be on the phone to the local Chinese or Mexican establishment or in the kitchen.

Oh good, Mom is in the kitchen! I just love moms. They introduce us to her by a big caption that reads Marianne Lindstrom. Then Noah, looking all of 14 years old, greets her with, “I’m so glad you’re here, Marianne.”

NOAH, that isn’t how you greet your co-worker’s mom! It was a slightly icky moment, kind of like when Zac Efron has his hands all over his friend’s mother (who is actually his wife). (But Zac is soooooooooooooooooo hot, that he can get away with it.) *

Marianne is…sorry, I just can’t do it, MOM is stirring the chicken pieces and they’re nice and browned. (Aida seems nervous that she’s there. Hmmm, I wonder if it’s the never-good-enough syndrome or maybe it’s just that her mom is nervous and she’s picking up on it or maybe it’s Noah is annoying Aida, who really should be asked to leave after his etiquette faux-pas.)

We learn that this is Aida’s sister, Ivy’s recipe. She's probably gorgeous too. Aida apologizes for using canned artichokes. The frozen ones add too much water and Mom turns up her nose at using jarred artichokes in oil, “It imparts another flavor, which I don’t like.” Um, I am not going to diss someone else’s mother…well, don’t read the small print, but let me just say she doesn’t have the down-to-earth friendliness that Aida has. In fact, she seems a bit snooty. AND WHO DOESN’T LIKE OIL?

Marianne (I’m deep-sixing the MOM thing) adds the artichokes. She’s stirring in a kind of anal way. Noah asks if Aida was always a good cook and her mother says NO. WHAT?!!

That’s like if my mother were asked if I was a pretty child. Despite braces and thick cat-eye glasses, of course, she would have said I was pretty.

And if she were asked if I were a good cook, she wouldn’t have hesitated in saying YES and she would NEVER have mentioned the peach soufflé 4 days in a row that tasted like rotten baby food. Marianne, there’s something called UNCONDITIONAL love. PLUS you don’t rat out your kid on television.

They show family pictures. We do learn that Aida danced for ten years, which Marianne seems very proud of. Perhaps that’s a higher status skill than cooking.

Aida adds lemon zest and basil and Marianne stirs. They plate it up. Marianne really likes it. She’s really lady-like.

Aida starts a cake, with Mom sitting to the side. Aida toasts one cup of pecans at 350°F. Marianne gets up and comes over to show Aida how important it is to grease the pan well. That’s okay, bossy, controlling mothers I can certainly identify with – not because I had one, but because I AM one, especially in the kitchen.

But then Aida says she (Aida) ruined Christmas one year, when her bundt cake didn’t come out of the pan and HER MOTHER DOESN’T CONTRADICT HER. Even I want to say, I’m sure it wasn’t that bad, honey. Wow, I gotta stop taking this so personally.

Aida brushes melted butter over every nook and cranny with Marianne looking over her shoulder. She sprinkles flour over the pan and turns it to coat every part. She taps out the flour.

Marianne is back behind the dem bench. She beats sugar into butter, while Aida chops nuts. Noah interrupts with a question about why add sugar to the wet ingredients instead of the dry. She gives an accurate answer – it incorporates better. I have a question! What the heck is Noah doing there? Aida measures out 3 cups of flour with 2 teaspoons of baking powder and salt and whisks them together. Marianne adds the eggs one at a time.

Question from Noah: Can you substitute skim milk for whole milk in baking? Aida’s answer is no. My answer is that I’ve done it a million times (probably more with 1% than skim) and as long as you’re not feeding the Queen of England, it’s basically fine most of the time.

She grates a tablespoon of ginger. Great (not!), there’s Noah again. I refuse to repeat his question about choosing fresh ginger. (Don’t buy it if it’s moldy. Okay?!!) Aida alternates adding the dry ingredients with milk and vanilla. She spoons it into the prepared pan.

The cake gets baked at 50 for 55 minutes in a 350°F until a toothpick comes out with just a few crumbs.

The bundt cake is out. It looks great. Marianne shows us how to poke holes in the cake with a long skewer. OH, I have some great metal skewers. The holes will allow the syrup to soak into the cake better. Marianne and I may just be on the same wavelength, after all. She gives such a picayune, precise tip that she’s probably best friends with Martha.

This is the tip: She says to make the holes for the syrup where the nuts are, because the nuts will camouflage the holes. That’s just nuts!!! And pretty brilliant. If that isn’t a type A tip, I don’t know what it. Maybe Marianne and I have more in common than I thought. (I bet our daughters could commiserate about how painful we are.)

Marianne also makes sure that the holes go all the way down so that more of the cake is reached with the syrup. Is this getting ridiculous or should I tell you that she also twists the skewers around as she’s poking to make the holes a big wider? She’s leaving no aspect of skewering up in the air.

Aida makes the syrup with ¼ cup water, 1 cup dark rum and ½ cup sugar. She brings it to the boil and adds a tablespoon of grated ginger and simmers it. She strains it and Marianne approves.

Aida grabs a regular spoon and says to spoon the syrup over the cake. Marianne says, I DON’T THINK SO. Oh, this is getting slightly excruciating again, and Noah hasn’t even piped it lately.

Marianne ONLY uses a grapefruit spoon for the job, because it’s pointed and gets the syrup in there very efficiently. I totally agree, but it’s all about tone. How about enthusing about the grapefruit spoon, rather than tut-tutting the use of anything else? Mom says it takes 20 MINUTES TO A HALF HOUR(!) to do it properly and get every hole filled. Aida luckily has made one 3 days in advance for Marianne to taste. Thankfully, it passes muster and they all like it.

You know what? I’m sure Marianne is a perfectly wonderful mother. Aida seems lovely, so she must have done something right. I guess I just like old world mothers, Ingrid’s mother, Lidia, types like that. Marianne is more Martha Stewart than Carol Brady. I actually preferred Alice. And no matter what type, I think they should be addressed as Mom or Mrs. or Ms. So and So, and not by their first names by upstarts like Noah, who frankly also seems quite nice (and well-raised) just totally unsuited to being on a cooking show.

*Yes, I saw 17 Again, but the exterminator was here and I had to be out of the house for 5 hours. ZE is really dreamy and I swear I’m not kidding.